Oct. 21st, 2011

nissinirvani: (The World)
Dustin broke up with me tonight.

For stupid stupid reason. Said that he wasn't good enough for me and I deserve better and that he didn't treat me as good as I deserved. Which is just silly. He treated me better than anyone. Even when breaking up with me.

I know he has issues. He drinks entirely too much. He's never really going to get over Kelly. But I didn't care about that. I love him. It doesn't matter. He said he's been biting his tongue lately cuz he wants to make nasty comments and lash out. But not at me. He said that I was that sweetest, sanest girl he knew and that he couldn't understand why I stayed with him. He's broken and doesn't think he can connect properly to anyone and that he'll never have a healthy relationship with anyone and I deserve more than that.

He said if we ever moved in together he didn't see either of us ever getting unpacked. I said basically well no duh. I haven't been completely unpacked like ever and neither has he.

He said I was pretty and smart and awesome and he didn't deserve that cuz he doesn't think he can care for me as deeply as I do for him. Which also doesn't matter. I can't help that I feel deep. Its just the way I am.

I keep hoping I'll wake up.

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nissinirvani

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